I'm an introvert.

Believe it or not, I'm an introvert. I get my energy from being alone. That's not the only way of defining an introvert, but it is one way. I revive and am refreshed by time walking, whether through mountains or along a river or beach. I am good to be with people again after reading, painting or being on my own.

Not all introverts are shy, not all are boring, not all are social misfits. Some are just comfortable with themselves, like to think deeply and know very little of popular culture which commonly seems to be the topic of staffroom "small talk." Introverts can find small talk easy but tiring – and sometimes boring. They'd rather have meaningful conversations about the depths of human souls and minds

Introverts can be witty, but they're less The 3 Stooges and more Woody Allen. Introverts process their emotions, thoughts, and observations internally. Some introverts aren't what you'd typically label "shy" and can strike up conversations with anyone. These introverts enjoy talking and listening to people, and going tout socially. But most introverts would rather be at home.

From How An Introvert Handles Awkward Situations by Ron Edmondson

Ron Edmondson writes, "To most Extroverts entering a crowded room of unknown people is not an awkward setting, but to someone wired like me, entering that same room, when not purposefully “working”, forces me into my introverted shell.

Here’s how I (Ron) tend to respond when I enter a room full of people I don’t know:

  • I find something to occupy my time – Play with my phone, doodle on paper, read my Kindle (you wonder why I carry this stuff…)
  • I pretend I don’t see people…often I don’t…but I’m likely to pretend just in case.
  • I hide in the lobby until the last possible moment…
  • I find someone I do know and latch on to them…
  • I secretly hope some likable Extrovert will approach me and break the ice… (Really, it’s not that I don’t want to talk, it’s just starting the conversation that’s often difficult.)

Ron continues, "The fact that an Introvert is in crowds of people does not mean he or she is comfortable beginning conversations. It also doesn’t mean the Introvert has no care or concern for the people in the room or that he or she doesn’t like being around people. It doesn’t even mean the Introvert has nothing to say, although he or she would probably prefer not to be put on the spot to say it. It’s that an Introvert’s preferred interaction with people is often more of listening than it is of talking and more one-to-one than speaking in large groups at the same time. For some reason, that I don’t understand, an Introvert can speak to a large crowd (the larger the better), but when it comes to having group conversation, an Introvert is more likely to feel awkward."


How about you? Introvert or extrovert and what difference does that make to your relationships, your effectiveness in your job?

Comments

Unknown said…
I too, am often mistaken for an extrovert. Not so! My most prized moments are those of solitude or with a special friend...someone who accepts me just-as-i-am. This person is a rarity in todays society. Most people, in my opinion, tend to attach labels to us on first meeting and then attempt to fit us into those, perhaps, wrongly applied labels.

It's often very difficult to not only think-outside-the-box, but to be outside-the-box. Nature generally isn't understanding of "difference" and most people, without meaning to, are usually the same.

Just an opinion. not a fact!
Woven and Spun said…
Funny thing is Jill, only a true introvert will "get" this! There is a distinct difference to being an introvert and being shy. Most well-balanced introverts aren't shy at all.
Angela said…
I'm an off the chart Extrovert, but it doesn't mean I don't appreciate my quiet time! It also means that after a quiet spell I am ready to be with people again.