My flower pots have been badly neglected through this New Zealand summer.
Some sit around the concrete slab that is my driveway & parking area behind the house.
Some are on my deck, exposed to full sun most of the day.
Some soften the approach to my front door once you come through the gate and in to a small courtyard.
None of the pots have access to groundwater as other plants do. They are totally reliant on me and the minuscule catchment area of their rim.
They go through seasons of neglect where the conditions take more than they can really stand.
When restructuring at work comes at a time when relationships at home are fragile, everything can seem to be too hard. When we lose a close loved one, whether pet, spouse or respected friend, the outlook can be bleak and the tank may feel depleted.
What about when those lovely children turn in to teenagers and things become complicated? Or when that close friend moves beyond where you can drive in a day? Many are concerned about finances and unsure of what's coming ahead.
Unlike plants, most people have some say in getting their needs met.
Some say.
Many people have little say as they are in marginal or precarious situations where options are few. My uncle often lived on the edge of the society I knew; the one where people had a house, two cars & a dog. He was sometimes homeless and we often lost track of him. His genius resulted in a non-conformity that baffled many. His choices often precipitated consequences he hadn't planned for.
Others have more say in their lifestyle and circumstances but still may not be emotionally equipped for changing conditions, especially if too many conditions change at the same time. Loss of job and loss of a loved one is a lot to handle at the same time. Moving to a new city and taking on a new job without the old network of friends nearby is a stressful scenario.
You have your own picture of challenges in life and feeling the weight of it all.
Two things come to my mind.
1. We must place ourselves so that our catchment area is large enough to bring in the resources we need, both daily and in extreme conditions.
We must live in such a way that our network of friends is significant and varied. When I have too many friends in the same small network I don't get the cross-pollination that enriches me mind and soul.
I took my old watercolour painting tutor out to a garden on Friday to celebrate her 68th birthday. She's fabulous! She's funny, creative, Catholic, older, a mom, grandma & a widow. Her perspective on life is different from mine. We couldn't even agree on how to pronounce the names of the many flowers in the garden; accents and what not. She made me laugh and I came away with some gems to think about.
I live with two women who know more about many things than I do, who have life experiences I need to call upon sometimes and who love me inspite of myself. We laugh together, keep track of each other and pool our various resources to solve a myriad of problems that arise. One needed a fine point permanent marker to label school uniforms this week. Ta da!
I geocache and hike with other friends I met through the university & circumstances of life. I love playing with them and am enriched by their perspectives and their humour. I had dinner with the family of another friend. We cut out letters for their daughter's first season of teaching in a primary school, talked bagpipes and chess and then theology. Talk about variety! Then I went to two weddings over the weekend. Both were friends I'd met through church.
(Now you know why there were no blog posts over the weekend!)
2. We must be aware of those around us and intentionally "fill them up" when life gets hard.
Self reliance is over rated. It's also lonely, limiting and dangerous.
Ever heard of companion planting? Symbiotic relationships?
Consider:
Life is good, but it can get hard. Let's not neglect ourselves or those around us.
Oh, the joys of those who do not
follow the advice of the wicked,
or stand around with sinners,
or join in with mockers.
But they delight in the law of the Lord,
meditating on it day and night.
They are like trees planted along the riverbank,
bearing fruit each season.
Their leaves never wither,
and they prosper in all they do.
Psalm 1:1-3, New Living Translation of The Bible
Some sit around the concrete slab that is my driveway & parking area behind the house.
Some are on my deck, exposed to full sun most of the day.
Some soften the approach to my front door once you come through the gate and in to a small courtyard.
None of the pots have access to groundwater as other plants do. They are totally reliant on me and the minuscule catchment area of their rim.
What if their catchment area is not large enough to bring in the water and nutrients they need to thrive?So it is with people.
What if no one intentionally fills them up with the good things they require for health & vitality?
They go through seasons of neglect where the conditions take more than they can really stand.
When restructuring at work comes at a time when relationships at home are fragile, everything can seem to be too hard. When we lose a close loved one, whether pet, spouse or respected friend, the outlook can be bleak and the tank may feel depleted.
What about when those lovely children turn in to teenagers and things become complicated? Or when that close friend moves beyond where you can drive in a day? Many are concerned about finances and unsure of what's coming ahead.
Unlike plants, most people have some say in getting their needs met.
Some say.
Many people have little say as they are in marginal or precarious situations where options are few. My uncle often lived on the edge of the society I knew; the one where people had a house, two cars & a dog. He was sometimes homeless and we often lost track of him. His genius resulted in a non-conformity that baffled many. His choices often precipitated consequences he hadn't planned for.
Others have more say in their lifestyle and circumstances but still may not be emotionally equipped for changing conditions, especially if too many conditions change at the same time. Loss of job and loss of a loved one is a lot to handle at the same time. Moving to a new city and taking on a new job without the old network of friends nearby is a stressful scenario.
You have your own picture of challenges in life and feeling the weight of it all.
Two things come to my mind.
1. We must place ourselves so that our catchment area is large enough to bring in the resources we need, both daily and in extreme conditions.
We must live in such a way that our network of friends is significant and varied. When I have too many friends in the same small network I don't get the cross-pollination that enriches me mind and soul.
I took my old watercolour painting tutor out to a garden on Friday to celebrate her 68th birthday. She's fabulous! She's funny, creative, Catholic, older, a mom, grandma & a widow. Her perspective on life is different from mine. We couldn't even agree on how to pronounce the names of the many flowers in the garden; accents and what not. She made me laugh and I came away with some gems to think about.
I live with two women who know more about many things than I do, who have life experiences I need to call upon sometimes and who love me inspite of myself. We laugh together, keep track of each other and pool our various resources to solve a myriad of problems that arise. One needed a fine point permanent marker to label school uniforms this week. Ta da!
I geocache and hike with other friends I met through the university & circumstances of life. I love playing with them and am enriched by their perspectives and their humour. I had dinner with the family of another friend. We cut out letters for their daughter's first season of teaching in a primary school, talked bagpipes and chess and then theology. Talk about variety! Then I went to two weddings over the weekend. Both were friends I'd met through church.
(Now you know why there were no blog posts over the weekend!)
2. We must be aware of those around us and intentionally "fill them up" when life gets hard.
Self reliance is over rated. It's also lonely, limiting and dangerous.
Ever heard of companion planting? Symbiotic relationships?
Consider:
There's a bush in Africa that increases it's bitterness the longer a mammal grazes on it so as to protect itself from overgrazing.
- fig trees and Amazon fruit bats
- Oxpeckers and rhinoceroses
- Flowering plants and pollinators such as bees
Cucumbers and their relatives grow peacefully alongside beans, celery, lettuce, sweet corn and sunflowers. Don't, however, plant cucumbers with potatoes. The cucumbers might become so depressed they'll turn up their toes and the potatoes won't be too happy, either!Hmm. If God built it in to the botanical world, we ought to see the value of it for ourselves as human beans.
Lettuce plants love to grow with beetroot, carrots, spring onions and radishes. Their best friends, though, are marigolds. The rich sunshine colours of marigolds contrast wonderfully well with the greens of lettuce leaves, and marigolds are said to deter many insect pests. Garden-NZ
Life is good, but it can get hard. Let's not neglect ourselves or those around us.
Oh, the joys of those who do not
follow the advice of the wicked,
or stand around with sinners,
or join in with mockers.
But they delight in the law of the Lord,
meditating on it day and night.
They are like trees planted along the riverbank,
bearing fruit each season.
Their leaves never wither,
and they prosper in all they do.
Psalm 1:1-3, New Living Translation of The Bible
Comments
Great post, I can spot the influences of other conversations here and there - makes it all the friendlier. Could have guessed you'd find a way to get 'human bean' in there somehow!!!
It beautifully sums up a lot of what I've been thinking lately about people & relationships.
I think you expose the limitations of your mental/emotional health when you have a group of friends very similar to you.
When we are willing to truly befriend people who have varying opinions we demonstrate a security in ourselves & a willingness to be challenged without feeling threatened.
We can then become less defensive of ourselves & our own opinions & more able to really hear what our friends are saying. Then they feel understood & we get to demonstrate God's love in the process.
Thanks Jill!